Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience:

Complaints of a very deprived child!

2011-02-19T17:39:00.000-08:00

I cant believe i made breakfast. For the devil.

This is why family dynamics fall into place. I cant help being so careful in my choices for a LIFE long partner. Really its .. not a business partner where you can just split the shares of the company and just go separate ways.

LIFE LONG. Kinda means for better or for worst. And in this case, its worse. Awful and Annoyingly WORST. Blame my possible exageration and biasness on violent Tv and lack of MAJOR communication.

Parents. Insist on principles and set cultures for how you want to build up your own personalised family~ (Whippie! with a tad of sarcasm) You wont believe it but its so dang important to have these values. Even harder to keep it going as your kids grow up. ( Good luck with that)

Kids. Just do the right thing. Whatever makes sense to you and try our best to be independent against society. If your parents teach you well. Instilling values and what nots. Good for you. If not. You'll still live. Just maybe if your lucky you get to realize when you reach a certain age you can set your own values and thereafter continue to live by them.

Why cant people just do their roles well. Suck it up and be a MOM and DAD. I get the whole crap about eveyone is kinda not trained for the job. But Gosh.. What happens to self help books and other "EXTRA enrichment classes".

KIds when you grow up and BEFORE! you have kids of your own. See Parent Guide 101 and my little blurp above.

Good luck and Good life peeps.

Wants to be more girly!

2010-11-16T17:55:00.000-08:00

I realised i havent used my girly powers that much. Being prissy and screaming EEEEKK.. Dirt. Fussing over tiny bugs and becoming a freak about uber cute things or anything that is pink.

Years of fighting the reality of the weaker sex and femininity didnt do me too much. I shall.. embrace! EMBRACE the Pinkness and Cuteness and all that comes with.

My Mantra so far= Individualistic Beauty with a tough slab of femininity.

Urge to Blog

2010-11-07T05:09:00.000-08:00

Feeling a BIg urge to blog. But am not in the emo mood to reminisce. I'm feeling awfullytickled. Just want to post nice nice Arty Farty random Pictures to Decorate my entry. I decided to type in a few funky words and google image it and this is what i found.

Word: Peace

Picture Taken from here

Word: Boredom

Picture taken from here

Word: Elated

Picture taken from Here

Sorting out the obvious..

2010-10-16T05:42:00.000-07:00

I got to get my life back in order again!!

My priorities are so messed up. =(

Procrastination is eating me inside... No more other people first.. ME ME ME! First.. Sigh.. I'm in my save the world traps again. You know how the air plane people always give instructions to parents(esp. Mums) to put on your mask first in an emergency before assisting your child t put his/hers on. THERE IS A GOOD ENOUGH REASON TO DO THAT! Crazy as it sounds... This blog to posted to constantly remind me again and again whenever i fall into this state of absolute to PICK MYSELF UP AGAIN!! =)

If i want to save the world.. I got to save me first=)

Uurgh.. I dunt like it that i'm impossibly bluntly right.

I'm gonna be smelling like daisies..

2010-09-13T22:09:00.000-07:00

Smelling Great.. with the Bathed in Vanilla and forever with the trail of daisies scent..

Love this.

Today's Daily Bread

2010-08-27T19:30:00.000-07:00

I like today's Daily Bread. Titled:

The Slowness Of Wisdom

When the Pharisees came to Jesus with the woman caught in adultery and asked Him what should be done with her, He knelt for a moment and scribbled in the sand (John 8:6-11). We have no idea what He wrote. But when they continued asking Him, Jesus responded in one short sentence: “He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first” (v.7). His few words accomplished much in confronting the Pharisees with their own sin, for they walked away one by one. Even today those words resound around the world.

Jesus had such a closeness to and dependence on His Father that He said of Himself, “Whatever I speak, just as the Father has told Me, so I speak” (12:50). Oh, that we had such a relationship with our Father that we knew how to respond with His wisdom!

Perhaps it begins with obeying James’ challenge to be “swift to hear, slow to speak” (1:19). This is not the slowness of ignorance, emptiness, timidity, guilt, or shame. But the slowness of wisdom born of dwelling quietly on the Lord and His thoughts.

We’re often told to stop and think before we speak. But I think we should take it much further and live a life where we’re always listening for God’s wisdom.

Lord, grant that we may hear You speak;
For truth within our hearts we seek;
For unto Christ we would be true
And know what He Himself would do. —D. De Haan

Listen to God before you speak for God.

AMEN AMEN AMEN...

Golden Opportunity

2010-08-25T05:52:00.000-07:00

Been thinking about the opportunities that are presented

to me recently. I cant help but think that this is God's test for me. Another personally created little obstacle that he knows i'll have a hard time completing. To many it may be a obvious choice to make. But its dang tough kay!

Golden Opportunities are hard to come by.. saying no to neither is like .. this picture below..

Its not everyday u get opportunities knocking by. I also dunt want to be the silly girl that is in trouble and prays and when God sends so much help in different forms and don't take it cause she was waiting for some dramatic entrance from GOD himself.. then ends up getting a earful from him instead.

Signs like seeing a random guy's shirt spelling out Holiday in Carins Australia and random things like seeing the book in the arts section titled: Going to Live in Australia Guide.. A random taxi's advertisement about Australia.

Maybe i'm not seeing signs that want me to stay in SG big enough. Maybe i'm just blinding them out. Of course i've received endearing looks from the people closest to me. And of course i think the biggest pull is a New job offer in Sg. This new position gives me the scope to help other people communicate better which i enjoy btw and brings me closer to my goal of consulting and educating.

I bet there are people already getting their slippers out wanting to smack me. *hold that though* Dont think i am oblivious to the fact that i'm dang lucky. Seeeee... told u its a different kinda obstacle. Most times if things are sucky my optimism kicks in and i suck it up.. and live it. But when too good a thing comes by.. or rather when choices are tough. It becomes a stumbling block. Uurgh! I know i should be thinking hard about the pros and cons. Dont think i haven't sub consciously. Thinking is easy for me.. Trusting an having faith is the tough bit. I think thats wad i need to learn man..

So i'm concluding... I'm not going to THINK about it.. I'm Gonna Pray about it truthfully and sincerely and madly Pray. And do other things to keep my mind occupied. Which lead me to having this crazy idea which i think i should share with Rev Goh. I found what i can do to serve God. =) Dunno if she is in consensus with my idea but hey.. i'll ask anyways.. very most i'll get rejected.

Feel Good Cry

2010-08-25T04:53:00.000-07:00

Feel Good Cry is dang good. With a shoulder to cry on would be better though =)

Just thinking about that makes me feel sane again. And also reminds me the importance and comfort in sharing my thoughts and burdens with God and his favourite people.

Korean influence

2010-08-17T19:53:00.000-07:00

Taken from a very smart cartoon website

Koreans guys are uber cute! There .. i said it.. ahah.. I know of too many that will agree. Mum would be the first to jump up and agree. Mum's been snooping around again with her concerned look asking if i have anyone that i like. I think she is feeling abit torn again about me leaving. She 's maybe having withdrawal syndrome again-Its her style. Its a cycle. She gets all excited about my new career path and opportunity.. then when it sinks in that i need to leave for Aussie, she feels that pang of sadness but rubs it away in exchange for a Its-for-her-own-good-and-its-a-good-experience thoughts. Then.. the thought of me actually leaving.. sinks in and gets to her the hard way and thus withdrawal syndrome. There is a up side to this and here it is- After waddling in that stage she gets uber happy when i do .. do well and get settled and she feels .. YES! completed one childs journey.. look at how she's grown.. then she goes and pat herself on the back and goes.. well done self!

Stages of change.... AMazing isnt it. Mum's awesome that way. I am crossing my fingers and hoping i get the same neurotic mum like nurturing technics that will drive my children crazy when i grow up! So fun!

Scared Silly and Mad Crazy

2010-08-14T10:32:00.000-07:00

Probably the biggest decision i have independently made yet.

All that talk about you only live once...

...and that opportunity rarely knocks twice-cherish it..

...and that Luck is what happens when opportunity meets preparation. ..

...ARE TRUE.

As i go nearer and nearer to the a new career path..

I feel like i am further and further away from home.

But then there is God's Plan for you and all.. So really the opportunity is just God given. Isnt it?

Daughters..

2010-08-12T02:36:00.000-07:00

Been Feeling the Ups and Downs with turbulence much too frequently recently. Beginning to wonder and experience the true meaning of living happily. Much to my dismay, its not the kind of lifestyle i am having now. Just like a flu. I'm sure i'll recover after coming to my senses.

This Book's title is good enough for me to buy it for SAM when he gets pretty daughters.

This song is playing in my mind now. Daughters have such a tough life really. Applause Please!

Daughters by John Mayer

I know a girl
She puts the color inside of my world
But she's just like a maze
Where all of the walls are continually changed
And I've done all I canTo stand on her steps with my heart in my hands
Now I'm starting to see
Maybe it's got nothing to do with me

Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too
Oh, you see that skin?
It's the same she's been standing in
Since the day she saw him walking away
Now I'm left
Cleaning up the mess he made

So fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you doGirls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too

Boys, you can break
You'll find out how much they can take
Boys will be strong
And boys soldier onBut boys would be gone without the warmth from
A womans good, good heart

On behalf of every man
Looking out for every girl
You are the guide and the weight of her world
So fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too [x3]

Epiphany alert!

2010-07-20T03:58:00.000-07:00

When i want something bad enough.

Take the first plunge into the water.

Then badly start swimming towards the goal. Just keep trying.

Eventually, I'll reach the other side. =)

Now the Plunge. Thats the biggest huddle. I shouldn't be such a WUSS. Right?!

If there were only a pill to be braver!

Afraid of Uncertainty... NOT!

2010-07-19T07:03:00.000-07:00

Jesus is the coolest really!

You know i've been reading matthew in the bible recently and in alot of parables Jesus is scolding the deciples that they have little faith. Sometimes, i think we really should be scolded for our lack of faith. I often wish i was braver to overcome all the little problems in my life.

My constant self reminder:

When i get thoroughly drained.

-To pray.. and oddly enough get peace within me and get more energy.

When frustration sets in and the situation is too sticky for me to handle.

-To pray for Calmness and Wisdom to solve

When i feel stuck and lost

-To pray for a push in the right direction

When all odds are against me and i feel stuck in a pressure cooker

-To pray to not use harsh words and have patience that things will unravel to be better.

Just as i feel kinda lost, the daily bread today was talking about HOPE. (See! Its not luck or coincidence... Its planned HE knows you and knows what you need when you need it. =))

Many claim to have hope, but only those whose hope is Christ can claim it with certainty. Hope comes not from strength, intelligence, or favorable circumstances, but from the Lord. As Maker of heaven and earth, He alone has the right to promise hope and the power to keep the promise.- taken from Daily Bread RBC

"The Lord has promised good to me.

His word my hope secures.

He will my shield and portion be,

As long as life endures." -snippets from the song Amazing Grace.

POsitivity Pass it on!

2010-07-18T21:50:00.000-07:00

Taken from http://dailykindness.net

————————————————————————-

Use Empowering Words When You Talk to Yourself, (whether you are speaking out loud or silently)

How do you talk to yourself?

Do you use the words “can’t”, “won’t”, “don’t need to”, “why try”? Many people do.

Do you find that what you say to yourself turns out to be true? Why is this?

You see your brain is like a computer that you feed each day. It doesn’t always know what’s real or not unless you tell it.

Example: If someone you love has hurt you, you may tell yourself that all people who love you will probably hurt you too. You may not even be aware that you are doing this.

Your brain just files this information for reference, it’s data, little zeroes and ones and no column that asks “true or not true?” Now your brain thinks, based on what you told it, that everyone you’ll ever love will hurt you. At the very least it is using this data in its assessment of future situations.

Now, what if we instead told our brain:

“Okay this person ripped my heart out – but that’s only one person. I’m lovable and have many loving people in my life who are not out to hurt me. I know that the right people are coming into my life all the time. If someone hurts me, I will forgive them and bless them on their way.”

Words can be empowering.

I can

I love to

I want to

I will

I must

I am

We can attain a greater quality of life if we feed ourselves empowering words and practice saying them until they become a habit.

I know first hand that it takes time. And I also know that it’s worth it.

Try it for a week. Catch yourself saying, “I can’t”, when you don’t really mean it and instead try, “I can”, and see how you think and feel about yourself.

Remember, the words you use to empower yourself will have a lasting effect, only if you practice

them and they become a habit (an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary).

They say it takes at least 28 days to develop a habit. After a week, you will see that it becomes easier. It’s a mindset and you can control your thoughts. Be proactive and not reactive – give yourself some good words.

Dream big and empower yourself! Believe you can and you will.

Most of all, CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY!

Stream Of Praise (SOP)

2010-07-18T20:44:00.000-07:00

I'm so glad to be saved!

Ever so thankful!

I didnt go to church last sunday. And i am feeling abit unsettled. Its like something's missing. I miss worshipping with the youths. Going on Sunday reminds me of like a family meeting. Its such a warm fuzzy feeling.

After reaching home. I hit the lappie for Holy songs. Did my own worshipping ahha.. and Quiet time. I'm so thankful to go for the SOP concert. Oddly enough.. I think.. i'm beginning to rely even more and more on HIM. Cause i'm crying more and more while worshiping ahaha.. I normally hold tears back. I think its also cause i feel that i am in Blame it on pride and insecurities, I'm so glad i can rely on HIM. I used to rely on certain people for security and re assurance, sometimes its just not enough. I get it even more now- why we need to get a spouse with the same religion. Keeping the faith together, Trusting God with path, Relying on him and having similar thoughts about raising a family.

After meeting the gang at jurong i was uber tired. But somehow i decided to go to SOP on sat instead when wk smsed. Initially was intended to go on sunday after church sessions. So glad i went on Sat. I think God planned it oddly enough. After what happened that day i cant help but let out a chuckle and go.. "God u already know this is going to happen right!"

Anyways... i went.. saved hamsters from suffocating in wk's car.. Haha.. I was thinking if God didnt place me there. Then wk's car wont have started. If i wasnt there to call for the other angel's daddy for help. If i wasnt there then i wouldnt have went into the "mama shop" and met this indian family who volunteered to drive us to get brake petrol and also by the way are christians form the same church we just left.

So fortunate to be there on saturday.. to experience his love for us when we are in difficult situations. Its so amazing really yeah? Very Miao4! I like when he uses me for these things makes me feel really important and i appreciate him using me especially when i am such a young and Ahem.. Blur christian.

I feel like everything is fast forwarding when this year after accepting christ. For some reason i am able to experience so much of his love and its becoming more and more transparent to me. Its no longer luck and coincidence. Its transformed into planned and reliance. And because he is so extra nice to me.. i also want to be extra nice to him. Haha.. God's cute that way.

But really sometimes i wish he could just tell us his plan. But hey! knowing it through an experience and through lessons is'nt that bad. Afterall, its a eventually thing since its all planned anyways yeah?! Read in the bible that God gives us all many gifts. Even though sometimes we are envious of others gift. I'm confident that he has given me all i need. I'm thoroughly thankful for the always cheerful and positive mindset he has injected in me and the madly nurturing nature he has carefully placed in me.

The glass is half full mentality

2010-07-06T07:11:00.000-07:00

Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.

- Groucho Marx

My Stubborn streak.. Lost!

2010-07-03T08:10:00.000-07:00

I think my opportunity has slipped away and maybe god planned for a diversion after silly me not accepting his hints.. after 3 times!

On a happier note. Stubborn as God know i am. He forced me into relying on him once again on friday. Haha.. Prayer does work! I'm glad i leaned on God's shoulder that day. =)

Today's Daily Bread:

Have setbacks slowed you down to a snail’s pace? Be encouraged. God doesn’t ask for a fast finish. He expects persevering progress.

When trials intrude to slow down your life,
It would be easy for you to give in;
But by perseverance you’ll overcome strife,
So just keep on plodding—with Christ you can win. —Branon

Great achievement requires great perseverance.

Anthropology Vs Psychology

2010-06-26T09:32:00.000-07:00

Anthropology is the study of humanity.

Psychology is a science, an academic, and applied discipline that involves the scientific study of human or animal mental functions and behaviors.

On the latest Channel five episode of Bones. Dr Brennen disagreed with Anthropology logic of what the Alpha Male's(Aka Top Dog) theory. She took a emotional and less evidence based view. Long story short. Agent Booth is slowly influencing Dr Brennen to feel more. At the bus stop after a "sibling linked to dad-was-an-alcoholic problem" Dr Brennen came out innocently asking if Agent Booth needed some time and space. Agent Booth had those longing eyes when he told her JUST time. So she sat down beside him. Agent booth being the family oriented tight lipped-do-anything-for-your-family-and-suffer-in-silence-type said.." My Dad.. he was an alcoholic."

Toooucching yeah!

Its amazing moments like this that make me feel... UUrgh! I want this! I want this amazing bond! I cant wait to be unravelled by a Dr Brennen.

Booth and Bones Video. Loves!

Unbelievable!

2010-06-23T18:14:00.000-07:00

I have not had so many deep sighs in 3 days. I wish i had more patience but its pulling my hair out literally. Wish i had a bigger heart and a smaller ego. I just had a epiphany again. Its easier to forgive a friend then forgive a family member. Maybe cause the hurt isn't so deep.

Today's QT:

So often we think only of money when the Bible calls us to give willingly and bountifully, “for God loves a cheerful giver” (2 Cor. 9:7). Giving others a chance and offering hospitality to those who hurt is generosity that makes winners of everyone involved.

The gifts that we may give,
The deeds that we may do,
Most truly honor Christ
When self is given too. —D. De Haan

The manner of giving shows the character of the giver more than the gift itself.

God on the fast lane.

2010-06-22T07:29:00.000-07:00

I think... He just spoke to me.

I itchy backside went to sneak peak on the daily bread tml cos i will normally read it in the morning then make sure i remember what God wants to tell me throughout the day and remind my self again before i sleep. So Guess what! It was exactly what i needed!

Reassurance from God.

Much of life is about “getting through” the trials and troubles that are inevitable in our sinful world. One of these trials is persecution. The disciples certainly found this to be true. They knew the good things that Jesus has ready for those who follow Him, but they met harsh resistance when they tried to tell others (Acts 14:5).

Those of us who have chosen God’s way, and who know from experience that it’s “a more excellent way” (1 Cor. 12:31), will persevere even when we have to go through danger and difficulty. By doing so, we show others a beautiful picture of God’s peace, mercy, and forgiveness. The joy that awaits will make our temporary discomfort worthwhile.

Its like he knows i need this! I love God.. He's so nice!

Straying away from GOD?

2010-06-22T06:40:00.000-07:00

I feel as if i have not been a good testament. Feeling kinda ashamed really. I havent done a decently long quiet time in awhile. I have on and off prayed. But i dont feel that i've told God everything i wanna tell him. I got LAZY! Urgh! And i dont like it! Sometimes i wonder if i am living a good testament as a christian to show mummy and family. Its so exhausting really to not sin. Even by trying suuupppper hard sometimes you will still sin. As i understand more and built up faith i am realising its getting tougher. Like Mu shi says the devil doesnt like that i'm growing so he comes to distract me. My most popular prayer request now, in fact only prayer request now is that i ask God to help keep me focus unto you and not stray. I wish i were more determined really.

Mei Mei is so encouraging. I love her.. She just flew from Nice to VERY NICE status already ahah.. I realise we are quite similar. To think i was so mature at her age ahha.. She gave me this verse 1 Corinthians 10:13 -No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

RBC's Daily bread:

Help me to walk so close to Thee
That those who know me best can see
I live as godly as I pray,
And Christ is real from day to day. —Ryberg

Pray Pray pray.. Must pray.. Sigh.. OKay PRAY!

1 week before the real world starts

2010-06-21T04:58:00.000-07:00

Living in sabbatical and sabbath has always been one of the best goals i always wanted. Now that i have 1 week left.

I realise during the first week that :

1) Having the spare cash helps.

2) Not thinking just doing is more fun.

3) Volunteering is more tiring than working (experiencing the fish outta water)

2nd week

1) I cant believe the first week is gone!

2) Money is half gone! (cause savings and bills still need to be pumped in)

3) Spend less Do more is so tough! And lazing around experiencing the not working but i am at home resting is tougher...(i need to do something!)

4) church camp was eventful, tough to take effect, a cry fest, Change in paradigm

3rd week

1) OMG! Work 's next week! DIE! I shouldve created another checklist (fish outta water experience coming back again)

2) I need to fill up my appointments and really make use of the rest of the time. (text me to book me)

3) I cant wait for payday on the 25th! I need to feel rich again. ( Sadly its very insecure to be that dry on resources..)

4) Starting to feel like i am running outta time and need to complete my checklist!

5) Feeling that credit cards are evil

The Pen-ing down of random thoughts leads to... this list below

1) Get roller blades and madly learn them

2) Go running tml morning! no blaming the weather and stop praying that it will rain

3) Financial planning

4) Plan for next year's trip

5) Have tons of epiphanies

6) Go to XYZ to help out

Facebook As a double edge sword

2010-06-21T04:10:00.000-07:00

Perception and Perspective plays a part in this theory of facebook being a double edge sword. Just seconds ago i had a epiphany again. Love those.

If your feeling in the pits which i was minutes earlier. Looking at facebook posts from your friend in Korea having fun during world cup and another friend Graduating or another busy complaining about the choices of whether Toyko or HK for her family trip. Well.. Uuh.. is it me or do does everyone feel a tinge.. or maybe a gulp of sour grapes! I'm dead envious and green eye jealous of their so happening lifestyle. I know this is just a moment. Cause once i tune back to my positive self again i'll be fine... But i'm not fine now! So thus this venting post.

Double edge sword cause it depends on how u see it. It can be OOuh man.. my life stinks and is like plain plain shit-o boring. Or Wow.. i have cool friends and dang! facebook is uber cool i can comment on my friends comments!

So there. My epiphany.

I love Jane!

2010-06-21T02:48:00.000-07:00

I love Jane! She's so sweet really. I love taking to her and she is SOO Sweet! I love how she has that older sister I'll look after you Gung-ho kinda loyalty with jussst a touch of innocent and pure sweetness. You know the kinda honey that is super raw? The kind that comes with the honeycone it has that i'm sweet but not artifically sweetened kinda taste? Yea... That JUST JANE!

She hates that i call her Jane-Y and thus JUST JANE is just her! And i love that she's just jane. Not afraid to say that hey! i don't like when you do that, but afraid that she'll hurt your feelings so she'll tell you later cos its just her. I like that she's so awesomely TRUE BLUE and PURE that way. Just like how young small little people-Kids tell you and talk to you. They tell you the truth and they give you innocently in pure good intentions. On a side note: Never ask your kid if you look fat in anything.

I like her interesting style too. She has the I am always on holiday specifically in BALI look.. ALL THE TIME. Do notice the Prints and non -CHAT4 CHAT4 full cotton clothes and the straw bags she wants to get to complete her look but i am totally disapproving of. We have come up with a full proof guideline for her style too. If you ever want to get anything please get something that is simple.. BUT complicated... Difficult.. Yet Easy.. Modern But traditional... Conflicting eh? Just think Holiday in Bali.. block out everything else.

I just mentioned to her on our super long bus journey back home yesterday that she's like a diamond in the rough really. It really takes a special person to discover her and then after polishing.. she'll be so shiny lah i tell you!

Friday Blues

2010-06-11T02:57:00.000-07:00

Its the first day off after 3 days of mad work... And here i am sick. Snug undercovers medicated with panadol and that cute little yellow pill that puts an immediate plug on that leaky nose with of course a tinge of yummy cough syrup. *On a side note. I love.. those tangy orange ice popsicles when your sick. *

My morning was spent throughly mopping thru msn and facebook. Then eventfully ending with a random pick of Sex and the city episodes online. Its like i needed abit of chick flick before i went for my girls evening out later.

The other angel called for a MENS talk. Havent had one of those officially for a long time. (closes eyes on the small random men talks) I've got some to dish out and i'm dying to hear the rest dish their thoughts on mine. MENS talk is much like when boys talk about football. Everyone has their own favourite team and Ahem.. team player.. =)

Off to meet the girls.. Will update if any spurs of moments of epiphanies occur.

Always dreaming and never wanting to wake up.. thats the feeling i'd love to have recently..

Thought-find moment.

2010-06-06T18:35:00.000-07:00

Its been a while since i sat quietly and blogged. So you can imagine how much i have to type now. At the rate i am going i'd probably have a ton of spelling mistakes.(*Not that i care enough to stop and backspace the gushing thoughts i have.)

OKie.. Here goes.

So we I just woke up 13 hour recovery from a mad feverish - sore back headache topped off with a really nice painful throat attack. I;m so glad i did my early morning Dump! that kinda makes the temperature in you like moderate a little bit better.

Any-Whos.. Yesterday's one of the first talk-about-your-future sharing sessions was fab. Jian Xin went for it too! That was a pleasant surprise. He's so different when he's with the YA and when he's with the Secondary school gang. He talks so grown up and proper and stuff. I cant help but have a tilt my head to the side and go Awwww... moment when i think of this growth with Christ. He use to be always in such a bad mood in school grunting and grumbling. But now WOW. I wouldnt have thought i could have a decent conversation with him without him cursing or spitting fire at every word i say. (i'm exaggerting btw) I'm just glad i see good changes in my friends. =) ( BIG AWwww... Moment)

In true fact. The trio(sam and the other angel and yours truly) have always been having our monthly talk-about-your-future sharing session. I think that our monthly sessions are what keeps us so tight. Anyways, hearing from the elders that joined us during the session. Gave me alot of reassurance that hey! It doesnt seems like i am drifting too far back and am pretty much on top of things. I can relate alot better with Elder Gordon's experience. He gives me alot of confidence really. I wished i could have known him much earlier in my life so i would be more reassured when i was younger. But i do feel that maybe God wanted me to go through all that tough times. When i felt so lost and frustrated leading the aunties in my practice. I just so much wanted to pull my hair out really. It so cute really. Even back then i know someone was taking care of me. And to think that i prayed the most back then.

Hearing from Meishan made me realise how NORMAL i am. haha. I always struggled with too many choices and probably am still. I'm sure everyone does struggle for a while when weighing out pros and cons. I'll get really lost in my thoughts and pros and cons.. and let my gut feeling and heart get some action on it and get let my poor mind get totally confused with all that inner talk. Just hearing that Meishan also is battling this, makes me feel wow.. okay.. normal. Especially when the duo are so quick in making decisons like that. It is these kinda moments that make me feel like i'm a girl again. Not a man inside. ahha.. Thank Goodness.

Beve's sharing also triggered some deep pondering too. When she mentioned that she feels unready for the tasks of settling down and maybe God knows that so therefore singleton. I think i could relate to that too. Besides having random thoughts of having babies on and off. I may have been shunning away my maternal instincts to aside. Plus i think deep down i know i'll be a sucky gf. I cant bring myself to meet everyday and stick like glue. I love my space and freedom to meet friends too much. I really dont wanna conform to change for the sake of having someone else like me in that way. And i think most of the time i take charge too much that even my friends are saying i can be such a man about things. I wish i didnt need to take charge too much. But i cant trust anyone now to take charge for me. =) I dont know if i am fussy or too picky. I just know that lOVE loves to sneak up when you least expected. Its like it just enjoys going BOo! I'm here! In another note, I would applaud any guy for trying to even come to break down the walls and attempting to gain my trust in that way. I may seem like summer on the outside but trust me its cold cold winter inside. Like what Elder Quan Ching says to Peter- be a loveable person and you will draw people to your liking.

I like this.. Always Say A Prayer- ASAP

Its Like God knows stuff... haha

2010-05-29T17:24:00.000-07:00

GOD is so GR8!

(Its like he knows stuff.. haha)

Was waiting for sherms to wake up so i was aimlessly clicking online. Went to see what God has to say to me today via Daily Bread(check out what he said to me that day!)

Guess What!

The Daily Bread was saying about Work!

We Pay too much attention on it. Without it we feel useless,unproductive,unimportant. GOD doesnt want us that. He wants us to focus unto him. Therefore he created the 7th day of work to become a rest day for us.

This is called the SABBATH.

I remember Mu Shi's last message to me was for me to enjoy my Sabbath! Then as usual i googled and found the meaning. Feel So GOoD! I strongly feel for this day's daily bread! Its as if God's telling me what i always am struggling with is gonna be solved once i embark on this sabbath. I am looking forward for Insecurities to dissolve, a clearer mind, a more loving and forgiving heart and of course! a Happier more spiritual Me!

He gives me work that I may seek His rest,
He gives me strength to meet the hardest test;
And as I walk in providential grace,
I find that joy goes with me, at God’s pace. —Gustafson

If we do not come apart and rest awhile, we may just plain come apart. —Havner

I need to love myself more...

2010-05-23T19:48:00.000-07:00

I'll be my own best friend. =)

If my body can speak.

Every cell in me would scream at me and ask me to be kinder to myself.

To be less critical and forgive myself.

To be less angry at myself.

And to stop saving the world.

Corrine May is Coming Home!

2010-05-23T16:46:00.000-07:00

Ilovecorrinemay.ilovecorrinemay.ilovecorrinemayIlovecorrinemay.ilovecorrinemay.ilovecorrinemay.

Anyone interested?

About the artists
Sonicflood is one of the most influential contemporary Christian music and crossover mainstream bands ever. The five-piece band have earned a Grammy nomination, won two Dove Awards and sold over two million albums. They have performed on every continent except Antarctica.

Point Of Grace has emerged as one of the biggest names in Christian music since their formation in 1991. The female trio have been nominated for two Grammy Awards, sold more than 6.5 million albums and earned 24 consecutive number one singles, a feat unmatched by any artist in any genre.

Corrinne May is one of Singapore’s most successful music artists. Her four albums have sold over 35,000 copies in Singapore alone and she has staged sold-out concerts in Japan, Los Angeles and Singapore. She has also worked with iconic songwriters Carole King and Carole Bayer Sager.

For more information on the artists, please visit:
Sonicflood: www.sonicflood.com
Point Of Grace: www.pointofgrace.net
Corrinne May: www.corrinnemay.com

Tickets will go on sale at 9am, Monday, 31st May 2010
Ticket Prices: S$98, S$78, S$58

Priority booking for all OCBC Credit and Debit cardmembers from 17th to 30th May 2010
All OCBC Credit and Debit cardmembers will receive a 20% discount off ticket prices

Itchy backside syndrom

2010-05-16T04:31:00.000-07:00

Due to a itchy backside i got CLEO magazine. Urgh.. succumbing to temptation. (After asking Fen not to buy it!*Smacks own head) Anyways...

Finally Got my Answer reconfirmed from a MAGAZINE..

God works in such miraculous ways..

God is really everywhere..REALLY!

Oddly if you dont see him. Sometimes you forget that he is there and that he still cares for you. Then you get all excited and in silly awe when he shows himself in different ways. And then you go- "Eh! He's THERE! HERE! EVERYWHERE!" Its like God's waiting for you to realise hey.... There i am, dont worry I;m listening to your prayer and you are still on my To-do list! =)

I wonder if i'm the only odd christian who feels this way.

Shopping for Dress alert!

2010-05-13T05:20:00.000-07:00

Miss Singapore Universe event on the 28th May!

I need ideas for the type of gown/ dress/style/Nail Colour/Bag/Shoes!/Makeup/Hairdo/Accessory

Above are some ideas i'm dancing around with..

Everything is GOD.. everything is possible with GOD

2010-05-09T08:48:00.000-07:00

Eli Stone

I'm glad i watched this episode. "Dr Chan" told Eli after he was diagnosed with a funny tumour in his head that caused him to hvae hallucinations about george michael and his dad. Dr Chan says there are two parts to this the scientific part and the divine part. It depends on which you choose to believe in. There is a reason why everything is such a coincidence. Maybe u are like a prophet. Eli denied this accusation and supported it by saying he doesnt even believe in GOD. Dr Chan says.. but u believe in righteousness and fairness and love dont u. Even the sun rising is all GOD. Everything is GOD.

LOve this show... Epic really.. I think i got my answer.. to my ponderings.. I will get closer in my sabbatical. =)

Pa-da-pa-da-da! I'm Lovin it?

2010-05-09T06:00:00.000-07:00

Ok Ok attempting to sound like the Macdonals jingle.. FAIL!

Just feeling like i'm missing out on something recently. I guess its about time again that i have my grass is greener fever. I just need to fix something and do something different again. To re charge and feel better and useful so i can go back to this.. BAH! So confused.. I want to feel contented.. SIAN...

Feeling Loved.. with a tinge of "I'm Puzzled"

2010-05-09T03:56:00.000-07:00

I'm so sorry i've been Cutting everyone's phone calls this week.(Sorry shermy and Sam) I was mad working and rushing to get certain events outta the way. Praise GOD! the event went rather smooth even with all the pressure and all the small but short hiccups. I feel so loved recently. Can feel mu shi has been feeling for me too.. and everyone at church has been asking where has my cheery energetic self gone. So got alot of Sayang sayangs from mummy and colleagues. Feeling Loved!

Plus! today sam gave me the sweetest thing! He gave me a BB! Blue bible! ahah.. Loves Blue... I think i would have smacked him if he gave me a pink one. more than 10 years of friendship.. at least he got that right.. ASk him now when my birthday is and he'll be caught in hesitation. He also got me another book by A. W. Tozer. Living as a Christian. Havent read it yet. But will get down to it.. eventually. Haha.. Thank you Aunty Sam! hugs!

On another note. Colvin commented about something during church to me which like many things.. i did not really care too much about it.. but like a lingering thought that was waiting to catch my attention. This comment eventually caught up with me and i pondered abit more into it.. and i thought.. HMMMMMM... Did he mean.. THIS!? I got abit confused like i always do if i dont ahve a YEs NO straight answer. Then as usual i thought in the more positive side first.. and then myairy-fairy thoughts got the better of me .. and i Shun them away like preetty butterflies in the garden. And thought.. Aiyah.. CANNOT BE LAH..

This pondering what ifs and Hoping is so.. teenager stuff. I'm too over aged for this. Haha... I figured anything i'm not sure of I'll let GOD decide. Even though a BIG part of me want s to know what he has planned for this HOT and COLD. I know everything has its time. I'm sure GOD is tired of seeing me ponder and dance around this idea over and over too many times to call it healthy.

Anyways.. I'm just thankful and feeling awfully blessed to be able to have GOD to sai-nai to. Haha.. At least i know he wont be sick of hearing me whine!

Crazy Mad Laughing ...

2010-05-01T04:19:00.000-07:00

I Cant remember laughing all silly and uncontrollably hearty throwing out giggles.. Thanks Girls! I really needed this break! Shopping together and buying super cheap overly cute tees. And trying out way too young clothes.. I remember saying i hated pink.. Now.. i cant help but love it! Times change.. my Taste changes.. and colour even.. I'm glad our Crazy mad bond has'nt!

We should have ended it off with a super cute NEO PRINT or something shahha.. Super old school.

Now... when can we have our Sexy PJ party in a fancy Hotel room! Only One WOMAN included~

Please! Walk all over me!

2010-04-30T07:39:00.000-07:00

I have to stop saying YES to everyone and NO to myself. Enough of Pleasing everyone. It just sucks being taken for granted and worrying for another person and being-"The Happy One". Its such a annoying expectation that others have for me.. I'm a Happy person.. just not all the time. Last i checked.. that's normal by the way...I've been thoroughly neglecting myself again.. =( I miss me.

I think i am scaring mum...

2010-04-29T08:14:00.000-07:00

After Watching this episode today. Mum panicked for me. The guy Lucas was suppose to help the lead girl become more womanly and have more success in her blind dates.

Lucas says dress for a date not a work meeting; A woman's bag is her life ( No Work notes!); Mind your body language and dont distance yourself from others; Dont volunteer to work late-Work is not your life;be more endearing overall.

I'm so screwed right. Haha.. How in the world am will i ever bring a small bag! I have got too much books to carry around! And err.. Work is kinda everything.. its so hard to detach myself from it.. I was sweating when this show was playing on man.. Its like a "Ouuh-Oh" checklist ahha..

Anyways, I had a good 5 min nagging till i scooted off to my room to write this. i wanted to reassure mum but.. I think ermm.. its kinda complicated ahah.. So when things straighten out a bit then i'll show her my living-breathing reassurance.

Life is unfolding

2010-04-26T05:05:00.000-07:00

I wonder if this ever happens to you. If Life is like origami. You start folding and folding.. like building paths and gaining experiences and then to finish off you UNFOLD. Like unravelling the reason for all the bad things or good things that happen in the beginning in the folding stage.

I remember talking about my incidences that brought me to GOD. I realise that he has been hinting to me more than once. And most times i did not even realise. Now that i am consciously aware, I am slowly looking for bread crumbs and picking them up as i go. I feel so fortunate now.. to be able to have the thin layer of grey off my eyes.

The Food place that i go eat at Far east Plaza at work. Right next to it is the Christian Book store. I didnt realise till last week. HAahaha.. i've been eating there for so long man.. These incidences just make me smile really.. cause i can feel GOD's love.

Ferrero Rocher

2010-04-25T22:30:00.000-07:00

I remembered a conversation with Sam about how some people are like hard on the outside and Mushy inside. Not very often in fact only the privileged sometimes get a sneak peak of the mushy side of these Hard.. HARD NUTS. Yours truly however is a self proclaimed privileged one! Its like i have a magnet specially attracting hard nuts with mushy insides. i love how i can poke around and then find their soft spot.

There are some NUTTY people who are just the opposite of this. Soft and frail looking on the outside.. but tough as nails inside. Just makes you wonder what they have been through.

The only similarity for both such types is that you have to prepare to listen to a Oh-so-heart-wrenching story to find out why their insides are so hard or so mushy. After which it just leaves you feeling so very heart heavy.

I'm special! I'm Ferrero Rocher. ( as much as i dont like chocolate, Ferrero Rocher can sometiems do it for me) I can be hard an crispy outside and all mushy like the ones under the sun. Or the ones right outta the fridge with tough insides and soft outsides. At different phases in life, i have been a Ferrero Rocher thrown in different scenarios.

I bet some of you are looking all smirk and thinking aww... She cant be that tough inside.. Stubborn maybe ahah.. I'd beg to differ. I'll have you know i'm a pretty solid nut. Before you start screaming -Independent Career Women.. EEKS! at me. There are times that as much as i try to stay calm outside. Sometimes i slip up and a tear or two sneaks out and a emotional burst happens. I'm a girl inside after all.. which also follows the fact that i love clean white sheets with many many different sized pillows and flowers and did i not mention i'd love to be courted!

Ha! Who would have thought i'd link this epiphany to the one thing i dont enjoy (besides coffee) ChoColate! EEw..

Birthday Wishes in April

2010-04-25T05:40:00.000-07:00

Sam was sharing that he would be in Aussie again from September to December this year again. After concluding that we'd be missing his birthday this year again. Outta randomness I sang him a PRE-birthday song. Outta secondary randomness, i made him sing one for me too.. ROFL..

I cant help it .. our birthdays are 10 days apart. I told him that i want an oven. Told him that its an investment for his tummy. Haha.. I think i may have spoke too fast ahah.. I should have asked for a more girly thing.. ahha. An Oven is so Oh Ba San!! Or at least very housewivey.. After i said that out loud, I was just thinking.. "Aiyah.. I should ask him for something shiny or super girly mah..Tsk!" I like how we can just ask for birthday presents now.. ahha.. its so much easier now.

Sometimes, I like how we put $$ aside and just get things for each other even when there isn't an occasion for it. Just-because-gifts are the best gifts really. It comes with a feeling. Kinda like a small pleasant mini surprise cum I just thought of you so i got this feeling. This odd feeling is normally accompanied by a Awww... U shouldnt have moment.

Oouh OouH! I just randomly thought of what justin said to me in Poly. (side track: GOSh! I miss him!)

He said to me: " Everyone should have a stephanie."

I so miss that dear boy! See.. He said this.. Just beacause! And yes he got a BIG... SMILE from me.. then he pounce on me a Big Justin Hug.

I think I've been naughty..

2010-04-15T05:29:00.001-07:00

Credits to Jennifer

Dear GOD,

I'm sorry to have made you upset. You must be very disappointed with me. I'm sorry lord for i have sinned. You know what i did wrong. I've so not been a good girl. =( Its so hard really, and i dont like it that i keep falling into the devil's trap. I want to be able to enjoy you're warm and giving glory. Please help me in my steps to you. I want to have a close bond with you. Please lord, help me keep focused unto you and show me the next few steps that you would like me to take. Lord, i know u will gracefully accept me into your arms once again. I know that there is nothing to separate our bond Lord. Thank you for dying on the cross for me and taking away my sins. Thank you for forgiving and re-forgiving me time and time again. GOD almighty! thank you for being my solid rock! my fortress and my deliverer!

The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.- Psalm 18:2

My series of Many Coincidences that lead to GOD

2010-04-06T06:52:00.000-07:00

There were too many coincidences that God paved out for me to finally find him.. Just wanted to share the few most recent(of which i can remember)

The Blind side..I love this show.. its a weird coincidence how i picked this movie out before i accepted Christ. And now.. it has a deeper meaning. click here for synopsis.

I remember loving and Humming to Plus One's Songs.. Corrine May's album. Spreading the love for these two fab CDs. Placing them both now in the clinic. Talk about spreading the gospel!

When new friends randomly ask if i was Christian back then. I'd often ask them why do they ask me that. Oddly they just said just because! or cause you look and act like one. This question coming from a non christian friend, sounded very queer to me.

In return i would ask- "Do Christians have a look? How can you tell from their actions?"

After being asked i often ponder. Its kinda like the Lord paving the path for me.. and he knows the best way for me to him is through my thoughts and pondering.. and curiosity.. ahah.. GOD's so smart that way.

Being Blur! and Super clumsy helped me realised his presence in my life too. Mum always tell me (Sha ren you Sha fu). When i always thought yeah.. thats it! I can only be like this and give this much. Somehow the road to the things i desire is paved out smoothly for me. I think it comes naturally for everyone to pray when in trouble. But i remember Thanking God too! For all the little obstacles he put in front of me. I think its maybe optimistic-glass-is-half-full syndrom input in me that is reacting out. I feel so proud now for truly believing in the "Good Side" of things. I always imagined it like this- God's putting this big rock in front of me now blocking everything in sight because he wants me to go in a different direction. This is His way of guiding me into the right path. Amazing how the back then "Good side" of things actually is "God's Way" of things.

Being totally logical and yet open minded about whats way beyond. Compelling! I know! This constant fight in me about logically saying to my self that there is no Beyond the Beyond that is looking out for me and that pure Luck and coincidence is the reason for my misfortunes or Lucky breaks, to the open minded inner me trying to take a stand and trying to justify that tingly feeling in me whenever Luck comes around.

Like Baby steps I remember i started Hoping first. Silly things like hoping I'd pass my test, Hoping my teacher falls sick. Hoping I'd not get caught eating this sweet!

Praying for all my bad things to go away or a peace of mind or guidance to get out of this mess to a blurry picture in my mind i call God.

Praying for every car accident i see on the road. Random praying for friend's and family members.

Seeking to find out who that blurry picture is.

I cant say that i have totally replaced Jesus in that blurry picture just yet. But i believe that He knows best for me. All these baby steps i am taking are solid steps to HIM! Just as Sam says (of something along the lines of this)-You don't need to know all the theory part before devoting. You just need to constantly seek him and enjoy his day for you.

I feel so fortune to be able to find you-GOD. And to be able to be saved by your grace! I'll share my journey here as God shows me the way and unravels his Perfect Will for me!

Happiness

2010-04-05T02:20:00.000-07:00

As much as possible i would like to be happy. Even when i try to make an effort to its just so tough these days. I know the remedy of all this. - Contentment.

I realise a while ago the feeling of content is something that i yearn for. Its important to feel contentment as it can lessen resentment, disappointment, sore sore muscles, wrinkles and not to mention LESS nit-picky!

Lets do an equation now yeah..

So if CONTENTMENT = LESS Disappointment/Resentment/Sore Muscles/Wrinkles/Less Nit-picky

And i like being less of everything on the right side of the equation.. then.. I really.. REALLY! should just be thankful and fulfill with what i have now yeah?

I am sure its just me. Feeling like i have to save the world again and be the best in every situation. i am just not very forgiving towards myself. The amount of pressure i place on my shoulders in terms of task and responsiblities and goals might as well be equilvalent to two bags of rice. Cutting myself slack is just not in my nature. I know.. i'll need to work smarter and be less volunteering. But thats gonna be tough too. The latter is at least.

Please help me Lord be more focus unto you and not other Gods! Amen!

I like my new friend =)

2010-03-30T08:24:00.000-07:00

Yesterday i was feeling kinda in the pits. Felt so loved when dear old Auntie Naddy responded to my Facebook sighs. Love ya~ Did i mention i met a new friend! She's giving me so much insight and i love talking to her cause she always never fails to surprise me with her answers. Spoke to Lixin yesterday about my stresses. Guess what! She told me to look at the bible's verse Ecclesiastes 3 :1-8 . Loves..

A Time for Everything

¹ There is a time for everything,

and a season for every activity under heaven:

² a time to be born and a time to die,

a time to plant and a time to uproot,

³ a time to kill and a time to heal,

a time to tear down and a time to build,

⁴ a time to weep and a time to laugh,

a time to mourn and a time to dance,

⁵ a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,

a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

⁶ a time to search and a time to give up,

a time to keep and a time to throw away,

⁷ a time to tear and a time to mend,

a time to be silent and a time to speak,

⁸ a time to love and a time to hate,

a time for war and a time for peace.

She's so wise.. so true(like ce jie says).. and soo cute! I like her! Her responses always never fail to make me go wow.. Just yesterday when i showed her my blog. She commented that i am a sentimental girl. That comment threw me off guard and totally took me back. I've never been called sentimental before. She's so endearing really. She displays a totally different demeanor with her "outside image". Her "Inside image" is just so warm and fuzzy. Come to think of it.. most of my friends are kinda like that. She mentioned that she likes the song 一个像夏天一个像秋天 by Fan wei Qi. I think we are kinda like that.. ahah.. In fact, The other angel is kinda like that with me too. =) They both remind me of the warm brownie and cold scoop of vanilla dessert. Whooo So nice!

Sweet isnt it?

一个像夏天一个像秋天

第一次见面看你不太顺眼

谁知道后来关系那么密切

我们一个像夏天一个像秋天

却总能把冬天变成了春天

你拖我离开一场爱的风雪

我背你逃出一次梦的锻炼

遇见一个人然后生命全改变

原来不是恋爱才有的情节

如果不是你我不会相信

朋友比情人还死心塌地

就算我忙恋爱把你冷冻结冰

你也不会恨我只是骂我几句

如果不是你我不会确定

朋友比情人更懂得倾听

我的胸怀志意我的有口无心

我离不开darling更离不开你

你了解我所有得意的东西

拆穿我留些意怕我忘形

你知道我所有丢脸的事情

却为我的美好形像保密

如果不是你我不会相信

朋友比情人还死心塌地

就算我忙恋爱把你冷冻结冰

你也不会恨我只是骂我几句

如果不是你我不会确定

朋友比情人更懂得倾听

我的胸怀志意我的有口无心

我离不开darling更离不开你

The Guiding Light

2010-03-28T06:14:00.000-07:00

After prayer tonight, It suddenly struck me.. that there is a possibility that i have semi accepted GOD through my CCA-Girl Guides. Yes yes.. Laugh all you want.. I was a girl guide! I love camps OKay! I was patrol leader for sunflower group okay!! ahha..

Oddly enough, i thought of the Girl Guide Pledge!

I promise to do my best, To do my duty to God, To serve my country and help other people, and to keep the Guide Law

Amazing huh! God's everywhere in all times!

Time flies..

2010-03-24T05:05:00.000-07:00

I suddenly got reminded of my age again. Feeling Pangz of Old-liness like ezema Itching to come out and then suddenly reminding you like an allergy that you are allgeric to time.

Today i just feel rather random. So i thought i'd just share my randomness...

Really Thankful for GOD listening to my prayer. Thank goodness Didi's okay. He really is a pain in the butt. I;m feeling God's presence around me like a big coat of protection. I do know that sometimes when i fall into temptation however, i can feel he is a little upset. But on another day if i make it up to him he forgives me.. then i feel awful that i have sinned. Hee.. Kinda like mum using her guilt trip tactics on me.

I remember looking up the song As the Deer. As i sang it i was like.. Whats this gotta do with GOD. I sorta got a hunch roughly how it might possiblity link up. BUt i wasnt sure, so i searched. This is what i found.

Psalm 42:1-2 prayed,"As the deer pants for the water brooks, so pants my soul for You, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God?" This should describe your thirst for God. That your soul-thirst is a sign of soul-growth. Get Thirsty!

__________________________________________________________________________

I am feeling rather thirsty for soul food.. so i turned to the Daily Bread, Music and God's Word(later on tonight)

Lately, American Idol Caught my ear.. ahha..

On a Rainy Day like this..

2010-03-22T19:51:00.000-07:00

Just when u want to snuggle in bed under the sheets...I had a sudden urge to be domestic.

I went Ondeh Ondeh Making!

Did the whole hauling back the groceries bit and started kneeding.. I only remember making it once. But it looked edible. =)Meeting my guinea pig Lixin later so (*crosses fingers) I hope she finds them edible. Hey! If this works out well i might get adventurous again and try out other dim sum -y stuff.

On another random note, I remember keeping a Prayer Log book after the mission trip for stuff and people i want to pray about. It seems like there is so much stuff to ask for guidance for and so many people that i know need a little comfort from GOD. I'm so afraid if i miss someone out. Plus i really want to pray better so i figured i better do it often-Practice makes perfect. It bugs me that my prayers are kinda long whined and you can significantly tell i can get quite lost and try too hard to remember everything and sometimes i get totally distracted. Uurgh~

I dont know how soon it'll be before i get the hang of things.. but yeah.. I'll get there soon enough~ ( Displaying Glass-is-half-full-mentality)
When my little Ondeh's are done Mum wants to showcase them at Ah mas~ Hurrah!

Ta Dah!~

Thus i conclude,My little domestic Adventure!

Mixed Up Monday

2010-03-22T06:21:00.000-07:00

Mondays have always been a trying day for me everyone. Dont you think we all should just face head on in Super opposite mentality to fight off this psychologically draining day? Somewhere during the day this short flash of my new year resolution-( TO RELAX, NOT THINK, WORRY LESS) came flickering like a animated click me banner on a website.

Since i've been terribly swamped with thoughts on how to solve the work issues and overly stressed with womanly problem, i havent been following up with My GOD. I feel awful. =( When Fiona shared her session with GOD while reading the daily bread, I remembered My patient giving me a set of the daily bread somewhere in my room. So i rummaged through and found it. Read it in the morning just like Mushi says. I funny thing is that i do feel better after reading God's word and i feel more reassured. Even though i may not know what is planned out for me yet maybe not until the day is over. It still does bring me alot of comfort.

Besides work stressing me, also other random thoughts also. Hmm.. I must be Post PMS-ing. Cause Sam also triggered a nerve today. I just decided to shove it away, cos it was a Monday. (This rhymes.. how cool is that!) Anyways... I may be over stressing or fussy over nothing i guess. I feel like i'm complaining that there is too much air kinda feeling. Anyways i refuse to fall trap to my Grumpiness and to prove my innate glass-is-half-full attitude, I decided to not show my stressed like a prune face at work as much as i could, talk slowly not like a machine gun on a rampage, tried very hard to go home early so i can have more energy for the next days to come.

Orkut Scraps - Monday Scraps

Bottom Line: Mondays should be one of the happier day cos we are still basking in sunday's glory and rubbing off all the fun activities. Lets just hope it doesn't rain in the morning.(*crosses fingers)

Quarter life crisis :Scene 1 (Act 2) @ The Airport

2010-03-20T16:27:00.001-07:00

So we did a threesome again @ the airport. Nothing short of sharing deep deep... THOUGHTS! of our current plans for the future. Once again an intense session leading to a major hangover of yawns and pangs of headaches. As this lingering feeling of having your head squeezed into a can continued we mentioned about here and there day-to-day events, ephipanies, work,everything else that is still stressing us since our last conversation, 26th year trip, difference between men and women, evaluation of our current well being. Considering that we didnt have a solid agenda written, the above was rather meaty topics.

As we camped at Terminal 3's Kopitiam, mid way after an hour or two.. i realised we were significantly scaring our neighbouring hungry people off. I spotted a raised eye brow and a few head tilts and adjust hair behind ear actions to tune into our conversation. So we talked without restrictions.. inhibited..

As we each blabbered about our day-to-days and each of us concerned about each other's life path.. I think we went into a world of our own, a place somewhere only we know.(WOW~ I cant believe i linked Keane 's song-Somewhere only we know. *Chuckles)

I cant help but applaud our MORE than 10 years friendship and put it on a pretty high pedestal. And yes, i'm sure we are more than doctors for the soul-forever on call, we are more than Charlie's Angels-fighting a ever long battle of good vs evil, we're lifelong friends- The Bao-Ga-Liao kind.

Big Hugs! The Other Angel and the Whiny One!

Random Thought #2

2010-03-17T10:03:00.000-07:00

Looking back, I have been talking to God quite a bit throughout the years. (Based on previous blog entries) Amazing isnt it. I'm So glad i was able to see HIS flashing bright lights to guide me to HIM. GOD's amazing!!

I'm Basking in his Glory! Feels so good like Sun tanning!

Afterglow Sunday

2010-03-14T07:38:00.000-07:00

Picture Taken from:http://graceevan.org

Sunday's after church activity was a sharing session after the mission trip in 6th-7th March. I wanted to share more when it was my turn but i didnt want to bore everyone with details. Thus resulting in this exclusive verbal vomit for my not so frequent readers.

Other than my the new experience of praying for Poopie(my little Bahasa girl). I felt God using me in many areas. When we were singing the worship songs in Bahasa Indonesian, I never felt shy to open my voice there. Normally, i hate taking center stage or performances, if i have to i'd probably hid one corner that type. But during that moment. I felt it. God's warmth giving me courage.

When we were in church, hearing the voices of the other villages sing along with us and sometimes louder than us. I felt so glad. I could see God in their place too. It was then i experienced God is everywhere. I was so touched. Like what the rest mentioned. You can really understand and see the true meaning of the worship when languages are a barrier.

Also when cejie preached I could feel his words slowly creeping into my heart. And then.. came the waterfall. Cried buckets really. Cause i thought of Poh Meng uncle's similar incident. Thank GOD for his grace on cejie. I remember he mentioned that it was through his prayers and other testimonials that gives him more faith. During his sharing today also i felt his honesty and truthfulness with totally made everyone(i'm sure) feel more relatable and paved the platform for the rest to share their honest thoughts. I thought that was fab.

Also when we were in the hotel where roomie(beverly) had her meetings. I could see how much planning and thought was put into the trip. And i linked it back to the whole morning's happenings with all the youths so fabulously cooperative and taking such leadership roles to that very moment. I also wanted to give them a Big hug! I could really See and feel the love ppl! Felt like a one united people moment.

I really enjoyed the trip and have come back so much stronger in my faith. I can really see the transformations through this journey. Super Duper loved my Buddies! Their just so much fun.. Teasing each other My policeman -weikang and Nurse-Rongguang. Both gave me alot of reassurance in their own way. Did i not mention how our van -mates and driver rocks! They make me so at ease and the sense of belonging. =)

I was assisting Xinyi (Our On-the-Job-Nurse!) to disinfect and apply aneseptic for one kid. I was near tearing when i saw his whole body with that many rashes. It was then the reality of poverty was instilled. Even though i know xinyi was nervous too and kinda lost. I'm glad i was able to remind her about certain things. =) Thank goodness looking after our first aid kit and emergency kits in our clinic paid off. I really hope to be in first aid the next time i go down there. A big part of me wants to organise a team to go for operation smiles. But i dont know if i am brave enough to go ahead as planned. *Silent Prayer~

I enjoyed the trip and also felt little victories along the way. I cant wait for more!

Update of Faith Growing Experience

2010-03-13T04:57:00.000-08:00

A whirl wind of things happened the last 2 months of 2010. I felt the Ever Loving God and the Wrath of God (just a tinge) in my everyday life. Experienced his faithfulness and bathed in his glory! Took many leaps of faiths and landed in HIS safe arms. I feel the courage and that feeling again growing within me to trust HIM to guide me as each day passes. As i Pray and Googled about how to pray, I learnt to talk to him and how to honour him. I felt HIM using me to spread the gospel.(Something which i didnt expect would happen that fast, but i'm glad it did.) The mission trip was also fabulous. I saw HIS work through so many people during that journey.

Even though:

Relying and trusting is just so hard for me.

Thinking vs Feeling is obviously not a fair fight.

I 'll stay determined, and focus(cross fingers)

In the past i was Un-consciously Believing that i was just.. Lucky. =)

I'm glad now I am Consciously Aware- That it was all his plan.

Hey God Almighty!~

2010-01-24T04:02:00.001-08:00

Sunday 17 Jan 2010.

I accepted Christ in my life. I was so excited. Still excited! He is really amazing! Just like how he drew a map for me to lead me to him. I'm so glad i found him =)

I decided to revive my blog to blog more about my new journey and all the amazing things i am learning now. I figured it would give me a bit more motivation during my rough patches and hopefully to any other christian who happens to stumble to my page.

Stay Tuned!

Grey hues turning to yellow tones?

2009-09-09T20:00:00.000-07:00

Finally got my fingers working on this and decided to do a CPR on my blog with faint pulse.

Signed up for Unisim today- BA Psychology with Business. Kudoos to that combo.

The Docs are heading into treating patient in chronic pain with medical and emotional issues. I figured i'd beat them to it and pick up a few skills to cope with that. I'm glad i'm settling nicely into twists of things and finally setting my foot down on the choice of what to study. Plus! I still get to do the marketing and advert part that i like(minus the boring accounting and econs bit).

Lately things have been a little(just a tinge) messy at home. BUT, i oddly feel really thankful though. The phrase, " What does not break you, will only make you stronger". Has a much deeper-roots-grown-in meaning now. Then again, " What does not break us, will only make us stronger"

I hate that i over think things sometimes. Not letting things flow unplanned, not allowing the people i love to make all the mistakes and wrong turns, always thinking i can help everyone and mistaking that everyone needs my help. This led to way to many sighs, worrying about being over worried about everyone's worries, alot of unnecessary emotional baggage, and not alot of time for myself. I've always said i want to do things for me. I feel awful that i keep procrastinating myself. I'm glad i'm taking baby steps to letting things FLOW and allowing certain people to GROW UP, without me medling too much into it.

On another note. I've seriously thought of joining the operation smiles group and teaching in nepal. Always thought that people who did this have gone bonkers. But... Yeah.. I think i'm heading into bonkerland.

The constant search for meaning in life. I think we should change that to constant search of things we feel good about and how we influence others positively yeah?

Its true, what they say.

2009-08-22T10:46:00.000-07:00

“Coincidence is God’s way of remaining anonymous”- Albert Einstein.

This is one of the little quotes from movie The leap years. I love this movie for its presentation concept, good plot about love, friendship, patience and mischievous fate. Corrine may's song is definately a cherry on top touch though. I feel like i can relate to her every song. Like it 's God's way of communication with me. The words that i couldn't express to him but so badly want to. Her songs are like the reassuring voices of God's. I feel like her song's give me strength. It explains and gives me the answers of hope. Her reassuring tone and lyrics triggers so many red flags in my heart. I really hopes she keeps singing. =)

My fav. song now is The Birthday song.

I have been asking for calmness and a clear head on a daily basis. On occasion i ask for a peek on a few pages in my life. I feel like i have been asking for alot and not returning anything. I dont feel so much so guilt, but more like i want to show my gratitude. I gotta ask sam again how i can do this. But lately because of Dr yap's dad's passing. I've been praying for him and also slowly realising how natural it is for me to turn to you for guidance and reassurance and i'm even initiating for a prayer. Even though i still dont really feel as comfortable using the proper way to say a prayer. I think .. wait.. I know I feel closer and closer to you now GOD.

Thank you for your angel's in disguise.

the 2 ppl in my life

2009-08-19T09:31:00.000-07:00

Taken From

A sudden rush of emotions overwhelmed me today. I remember bawling like today a few years back. The same kinda painful release of emotions. I'm not your regular kick up a fuss and cry out loud and whine kinda girl. I have that cry silently held back want-to-be-brave sorta tears. Thankfully only very few besides family have seen me at my worst.

With bee swollened eyes, saliva and mucus slobbering in a curled up position. I really thought they were the best then. Even when they never said any comforting words after the breakup. I'm so thankful they just laid in bed and comforted me while i cried myself to sleep. After making that heart breaking decison then, I couldnt cry for days and felt so clogged up. While crying i remember thanking GOD for them.

Somehow, when weisze tells me that she is very proud of my efforts and gives me encouragement in forms of little letters and messages, I feel really awesome. I feel comforted that sometimes when i call sam when i fall sick he offers to come with food and comfort.

Our airport trips and cook outs. Even when our group becomes bigger with gfs and bfs.. I think i'd still have that bit of selfishness to meet with just the two of them to have our "intense grown up thoughts". I think its come to a point that i dont think i can survive properly without these 2 people somewhere hovering in my life. I miss you guys!! I havent given u guys a decent hug in years! We gotta find an excuse meet soon, Just us!

Just Thought it time to revive this sleepy blog

2009-07-18T21:57:00.000-07:00

With my dusty Mac and the nice weather i've decided to do some updates. Stuff been happening New people in my life, Unexpected epiphanies, Changes in Perspective, @ the work place "DANCES", Graduation, Secret VOdka Rendevous.

I'm very thankful for the new people that HE has added into my life. Like a good pot of stew i think we blend in very well. I'm bowled over yet again at how a sincere hug and gentle words can make me weak in the knees. Also, it never ceases to amaze me how sincerity can reach out to the coldest of persons. I will try to emulate that amazing sincere heart to the ones i care about.

I miss cooking. You know how they say if you cook with your heart food kinda taste better and all? I used to think that that was all BULL. Later i found that it had some truth in it. No wonder my food tastes .. different lately.

Dental Nurse school Graduation! Oh oh! and the After party! Sweet Sweet flowers!

Zaid's still sending me selective songs that have meaning to them. Today his song post is switchfoot's GONE. (plus some oddly random Gundam robot thing)

Looks like the Secret VOdka De-stressing Sessions have been an essential part of life.

2009-07-18T08:51:00.000-07:00

These word from him" Just be yourself ... I believe in you" was enough

to get me blurry and in a puddle of tears. =)

I'm very grateful for u!

BSc(Hons) Visual Communication with Business

2009-06-07T07:38:00.001-07:00

Yeap! This is it! UniSIM here i come!!

So excited about this!!!! Thank goodness for this dynamic course combination. Its like its calling out to me. Of course the branding and marketing aspect of the course appeals to me. WhoOOo.. and the visual communications and advertising part just simply like a very juicy cherry on a already yummy pure vanilla ice cream adds to all the euphoria.

Even though after i graduate i'd be closer to my expiry date(sherms implies).

But Hmm. Crazy thought-thats the least on my mind! Who says getting married earlier equals a happily ever after!(Me: Spits back)

I just hope i dont drown in all this overwhelm-ment. I am glad i am taking new steps into the unknown!! Haha.. Now i have an excuse to pursue photography. =)

Check out NAFA's graduate projects -

Link up!

( Some really decent pieces)

Day and Night.. Cats and Dogs.. Love and Hate..

2009-06-06T21:33:00.000-07:00

This song has a nice happy tune to it... Until you see the lyrics.

I like how day and night the lyrics and tune are. The contrast kinda make it a pretty match. Hmm.. Kinda like most odd things in life huh!~

Note: Play it on my entertainment corner *look left*

Lene Marlin

I'm sitting down here

Sitting down here your words cut rather deeply,
Theyre just some other lies
Im hiding from a distance,
Ive got to pay the price
Defending all against it,
I really dont know why
Youre obsessed with all my secrets,
You always make me cry
You seem to wanna hurt me
No matter what I do
Im telling just a couple,
But somehow it gets to you
But Ive learned how to get revenge
And I swear youll experience that some day

Im sitting down here,
But hey you cant see me, kinda invisible
You dont sense my stay
Not really hiding, not like a shadow
Just thought I would join you for one day
Im sitting down here,
But hey you cant see me

Im trying not to avoid you,
Just dont wanna hear your voice
When you call me up so often,
I really dont have a choice
Youre talking lie you know me
And wanna be my friend
But thats really too late now,
I wont try it once again
You may think that Im loser,
That I dont really care
You may think that its all forgotten,
But you should be aware
Cause Ive learned to get revenge
And I swear youll experience that some day

Im sitting down here,
But hey you cant see me
Kinda invisible
You dont sense my stay
Not really hiding, not like a shadow
But sure I wanna join you one day

This song STINGS doesnt it! Definately written by a revengeful girl. Haha..

My Ah Ma!

2009-06-06T20:28:00.000-07:00

My AH Ma is just oozing cuteness. Yesterday at her place we were talking about my uncle's wedding in October. The aunties were asking me to "Look out" for a little shawl or a nice sparkly cropped jacket for Ah Ma to match the very vintage beige sleeveless gown.

Ah Ma is super excited about the wedding and what to wear and stuff but is trying to be super nonchalent and acting all its okay fuss free about things but she is fussing over what bag to match with the shoes she might wear and if the jewelry is enough. So adorable ~

So i got her to do a little fashion show for me to try out that very aged beige dress. I helped her get dress. its so cute cos i have limited hokkien vocabulary and she and i communicate by playing charades most of the time. She was getting tangled in the petticoat(inner layer of dress). I think i did the cutest thing. I raised both my hands up and told Ah Ma to do the same while i help her adjust the heavy gown. I chuckled at my suddenly memory of Ah ma changing my clothes for me when i was little. After much fussing,now here comes the double irony. Turns out... That she grown outta it!

Ah ma reminds me so much of my mum. She has this very cute "HOO-HAAR" quality about her. When they discover something new or semi-shocking. They Do a HOO! and HAAR! sound effect. She was like "AiyOo ~~~Buai Sai Cheng"( AiyooO cannot wear ah) with loads of giggles, followed by loads of other sound effects like HOoo OOrh.. OO...OOhh.. and HAAR~

Then after the dress event we got into all the other details like jewelry la... makeup la... Shoes la... Hair la.. bag la.. and did the "HoOO.. HAAR" thing all over again.

So turns out my aunts are not gonna be able to take leave to come in the tea ceremony thing so they are giving me the task to look out for Ah ma and get her prepared for the wedding and all the other chinese traditional stuff (which i have not clue about) like red eggs and what not. But really i am really excited to get ah ma all dolled up for it! I'll post a picture of her soon! Stay tuned in October for it!

AHHA......My AH MA is so cute lah!

Sprucing up

2009-06-06T19:56:00.000-07:00

The internet is a wonderful resource. I found out that nail polish turns out to be the perfect remover for cleaning mac white keyboards. The letters "M" , "A", "C" have never looked so white. Just like MR. MACdonals says it.. I'm Loving it~

Yes, i have been discovering about my mac everyday with my bosses at work who have been bitten by the mac-attack virus a long time ago. Now dont get me wrong. I still have a soft spot for windows. But MAC.. Oh MAC... has gotten me GOOD.

Just because...

2009-05-28T08:48:00.000-07:00

One day you just wake up and its all gone. Everything, Everyone. Gone.

I havent cried like this since.

Sometimes it just takes a few word to like bullets to the heart. It just hits the right spots.

It rained terribly inside today. Its just too bad my fav bus driver was not there.

Talent time!

2009-05-24T06:28:00.000-07:00

I want a TALENT!

A new morning...

2009-05-08T19:18:00.000-07:00

Went to get supplementalised with Dr gan. She tested me sub-space with what i like to call her hocus pocus machine-The QX machine. Its amazing really. Better than any palmer reader. I dont know enough to thorougly believe it. But i am open to the idea of a possiblity. Cool thing really .

This is what it tests for:

	Food Sensitivities
	Nutritional Deficiencies
	Spinal / Cranial Sacral
	Dental / TMJ
	Adrenal Function
	Environmental Factors
	Hormone Levels
	Mental Energy
	Organ Function
	Hydration / Oxygenation
	Acid / Alkaline Balance
	Toxicities – exposure to excess chemical, heavy metals, mercury

	Trauma (damage) – includes physical, psychological, emotional, spiritual
	Pathogens – bacteria, fungi, viruses, parasites

	Homeopathic Therapy
	Allergy Testing & Desensitization
	Meridian Therapy / Electro-Acupuncture
	Chakra Balancing
	Weight Loss Therapy
	Risk Profile Analysis
	Anti–Aging Therapy
	Emotional Release
	Auto-Frequency Therapy
	Color Therapy
	Electrodermal Screening

Mind Blowing Nerd fest top music hits

2009-04-26T23:26:00.000-07:00

PCR... rings a bell? Polymerase Chain reaction is a technique to amplify a single or few copies of a piece of DNA across several orders of magnitude, generating millions or more copies of a particular DNA sequence.

Quote of the day~

2009-04-22T08:20:00.000-07:00

No One can make you feel inferior without your consent.

I came across this quote by pure chance. Been webbing and saw this article. Everyone who has ever been bullied before should read this.

Bullying can take many forms, including verbal abuse; threatening, humiliating or offensive behaviour; or work interference.

The following common tactics form part of the workplace bully’s arsenal:

Spreads malicious rumours about other people
Ridicules or demeans people
Excludes people
Micromanages people or is an overbearing supervisor
Makes unwelcome sexual advances
Threatens people
Persistently criticises people
Withholds information
Removes people’s responsibilities
Overloads people with work

Psychologists say the following could trigger bullying behaviour:

a feeling of incompetence in handling his or her own job
a feeling of having missed out on a promotion
a feeling that a highly competent and popular colleague might be a threat to his or her position
a personality clash with a colleague
domestic personal problems, which make the individual feel insecure and inadequate

Parts of which are taken from http://www.gibsreview.co.za

Random thought #1

2009-04-20T07:26:00.000-07:00

Do not force love - it will come in good time, it will come

A Reminder of why we keep doing what we do..

2009-04-18T19:20:00.000-07:00

This SOng is like a wake up call...

The CLIMB

I can almost see it
That dream I’m dreaming but
There’s a voice inside my head sayin,
You’ll never reach it,
Every step I’m taking,
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking but I
Got to keep trying
Got to keep my head held high

There’s always going to be another mountain
I’m always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes I'm going to have to lose,
Ain’t about how fast I get there,
Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side
It’s the climb

The struggles I’m facing,
The chances I’m taking
Sometimes they might knock me down but
No I’m not breaking
I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I’m going to remember most yeah
Just got to keep going
And I,
I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on,
cause

There’s always going to be another mountain
I’m always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes I'm going to have to lose,
Ain’t about how fast I get there,
Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side
It’s the climb

There’s always going to be another mountain
I’m always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Somebody's you're going to have to lose,
Ain’t about how fast I get there,
Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side
It’s the climb

Keep on moving
Keep climbing
Keep the faith baby
It’s all about
It’s all about
The climb
Keep the faith
Keep your faith

Living in Content vs Living Cluelessly

2009-04-18T01:16:00.000-07:00

A friend commented that i am always complaining about not meeting expectations fast enough. I do realise that i havent been savoring my victories much or basking in my glory. In fact, i think i kinda dismiss it like it was a stepping stone which was just part of the expectation. Looking back at my past few entries i think i preetty much turned into a super big sour puss and just very un-contented with alot, nick-picking the impossible, having unreasonably demanding expectations in such short period of time. She says i am possibly being pressured by mum and her expectations for me. All thanks to all the men living with us, slowly but steadily giving us more reason to embrace divorce and singlehood.

I think never knew stopping to smell the flowers and savoring victories was this difficult!

REASON:I need a break and something to look forward to...

2009-04-17T10:42:00.000-07:00

DINNER @ IKEA TAMPINES BISTRO?

WEEK OF 27 april to 2 may?

Powerful nice girl?

2009-04-05T06:55:00.000-07:00

I'm always battling this dilemma. Struggling between being a nice person and being someone with authority. I dont like feeling bad after correcting my team members. Neither do i enjoy picking on them. We all just want to do our jobs. When things get too friendly it gets complicated. how do you draw the line where respect, age, authority and friendship lie?

I feel like a mum.. at work and at home. I should slow down.. worry less. Though it still bugs me that the bosses are not as worried as i am abt where things are going. At this rate it is so difficult for me to convince my mum again. Who has been nagging AGAIN for me to move on to another company. she says my pay... sucks =( .

It doesnt help that all my "friends" decide to either have depression or are emotionally unavailable or just too tired to help. I look at my phone and gosh.. no one person pops up in my mind. Why do i feel like this ever so often? Mum says i need new friends.. i cant disagree.

Dear God,

Show me the "light"?

From the forever worried random girl

That Thing You do...

2009-04-04T23:38:00.000-07:00

Hmm.. Snappy!

That Show brings back memories. I cant recall exact details. But i vaguely remember enjoying this show with some guy on the phone. Was sharing our thoughts and how cool the whole song was. I cant remember who it was but it was just snappy.

I forgot how yummy Blues music can be..

Ukulele Blues

2009-03-28T20:50:00.000-07:00

Lovin~ This Guy's Style... Face melting already..

I feel blessed... But...Unsure?

2009-03-22T03:37:00.000-07:00

Last few days was kinda passing way too fast for my liking.

Its switching way too fast for me to calm down and cool off before even thinking how i can express my emotions. I just wished i had a little more time to settle into each feeling better.

Everytime i feel kinda lonely and wish i had someone to lead on. HE plans for some good thing to happen or someone to happen to pop into my life to keep me entertained for a while. Lately, HE gave me opportunity to try out something i'd always wanted. Now i'm just waiting for a reply to see if i can grab that opportunity.

I think God's trying to guide me into a direction. Maybe HE's trying to tell me not to worry and that he has it all planned out for me? I am just too curious about the plan! See how HE teases me when he only shows me snippets of my life and how it could be!

I was kinda excited a few days ago about this new opportunity but found no one really free to share this.. But its okay.. You all know now. Esther commented that weisze and my previous entry was a little harsh. I wrote that entry feeling rather disappointed with a good friends. I wanted to convey my feelings of disappointment unto them. Despite the numerous nudges and hints and blatant fact thrown at them, there was no progress. The sad truth is.. and zaid's always telling me this.. IS THAT.. If your friends dont make an effort to meet then forget them. Maybe we're all growing apart?

I told GOD i will try to be kind-er.

I'd be kinder to the people who neglect me and understand that they are spending their time doing something worth while.

I'd be kinder to the people whom i cannot stand even breathing my air and tell myself that YES i will be courteous and smile and even create casual talk besides saying HI and BYE.

I'd be kinder and more tolerable about the small things(even though it irks me so) because every BIG thing in life is made up of small stuff.

BUT! its so hard!! =(

Steph's NEW lingo! "Dropping......cold fish!"

2009-03-19T09:01:00.000-07:00

Lovely fish lips Taken from: this lovely webby

I've adopted the new phrase " dropping you like a cold fish"

ALL thanks to some very charming people

I dedicate this fish lips to you and also to remind myself not to fall trap to COLD FISH..

PS: I still very much love eating fish

Reason OR Excuse

2009-03-15T06:59:00.000-07:00

"Because i dont have the time to..."

Reason? OR Excuse?

I think the answer to this tug of war is PRIORITY and CHOICE

I guess its just not nice saying

" I CHOOSE to not attend you event, BECAUSE its not a PRIORITY"

We make time for the important stuff- Things that matter

We make time for stuff we like to do

We choose to take others for granted

We prioritize and we make plans, based on our own preferences

Now all we need to be clear of...

What the important stuff and important people and important events are.

Strangely fruitful Friday 13th

2009-03-13T06:10:00.000-07:00

I hope Friday the 13th was kind to all you readers.

Knowing that by some force of nature that the influence of friday the 13th has on us. I decided to welcome it with open arms. I take Friday the 13th as a day where find comfort tagging whatever bad thing that happen that day and linking it up to reassure myself that such "swayness" (if any) only happens once every year. So thank goodness.

Today was strangely quite fruitful. Other than Dr yap sick today and other small things that happen. I think we made it through pretty safe today. D yap mentioned that i was very cheery this morning and that he could feel my energy. He commented that i gave him the energy today yeayness! Then i commented that someone once said the same thing ahha. He then apologised for indirectly reminding me of him. I then continued by saying that its okay now we're all good friends trying very hard to live our lives. =)

I'm so proud of myself today haha.. I am amazed at how naturally confident that sentence came out. What a strange friday 13th.

Falling in love with creamy vanilla.. and MORE!

2009-03-07T07:20:00.000-08:00

Oouh ooUh.. did i mention how sweet dr lim was.. he went out to dr lam's to do a surgery.. and came back with ice cream for us! Whee... whenhe came running to me and told us he had ice cream.. shirely and i ... very naturally did a "Yeaaaayyyyy!!" ahah.. See what ice cream does to us.. ahha.. I picked out Macadamia Nut without hesitation.

With the creamy.. CREAMY vanilla.. and nice crunchy macadamia Nut... what a glorious combination.

And Yes.. i am still in my i love vanilla phase.. Screw Chocolate.. !

Embracing New Skin

2009-03-07T04:15:00.000-08:00

Whoever said Beauty is Skin deep is right. It does start skin deep. But it doesnt help to keep it nice outside too.

Every girl has her own beauty regime. From facial washes to toners to serums and gels to a bag of whitening products and truck loads of lotions and scented lip balms. We have evolved from the soap and water days to body washes and prescription facial washes. If any guy thinks that its easy being a female, they should try. Currently these are the products i am lovin~

Fancl facial washing powder

Because of its powder form it is so easy for traveling and like washing powder it has that squeeky clean effect on my skin

L'occitane 's Rose Hand Cream ( a gift from Dr Gan)

Love its light scent and not-so-sticky -after -feel

Neutrogena's Oil free Eye Makeup remover

I love how you can wear thick volumising mascara and not worry. Plus! it doesnt leave that oily eye feel.

L'oreal gentle Cleansing Milk

For removing makeup ( Smells good and gentle)

The Body Shop's Coco Butter Wash and Body lotion

I LOVE THIS! Its my all time pampering fav! For a non-chocolate lover.. even this sweet creamy chocolate tasting body wash is yummy..

*Please have BODY SHOP PROMO SOON! ( crosses fingers)

Mum Always complain i dont take care of myself. which is true. I cant help but blame it on genetics. Though i'm pretty blessed with okay skin. It can be improved. I decided a while ago after the bangkok trip to give my skin a break. The pollution in bangkok was terrible as usual. In order to get its radiance back i decided to stop makeup for a few weeks. Its been 2 weeks now and non of the doctors are complaining that i should put more makeup. ( gig

gles) I secretly put on more shimmery lip gloss to hide the bare face.

After that makeup fasting period i will start to replenish and get that radiance back again. In one word HYDRATION!!

On another note.

I went kayating with Wen Yun last sunday @ lower seletar. tried out Sun play's sunscreen. Was pleasantly surprised at the texture when applied. Like liquid paper(correction liquid) it has this ball bearing inside to stir up all the liquids. It comes out as a white liquid but blends into skin colour on application. Most importantly it is NOT STICKY or OILY.

In short, I love it. You should too.

I think god's trying to communicate..

2009-03-05T05:11:00.000-08:00

Taken from : www.godtalkstoyou.com

I used to stand at my window plane and staring up interlocking my fingers in a palm to palm position every night. i used to talk to you. I wonder what changed.

Today, or rather just recently i felt your presence again. i SMS-ed Sam telling him " I think god is trying to tell me that no mater how you run, some things are just meant to be and some people are just meant to meet."

I think your trying to tell me something.

Here's me trying to tell you - that i have not forgotten YOU. Thank GOD(you)!

2009-02-24T07:20:00.000-08:00

Did a facebook quiz

I'm Mulan
You are the self-made princess and the epitome of the modern woman. Beautiful and refined, you are capable of saving any situation, be it your family or your country. You don't need a prince to save your ass. The damsel in distress situation does not apply to you. Your true love is whoever is strong enough to match your intellect. In other words your prince doesn't pick you, you pick him. You're Mulan!

Being a MULAN not fun anymore! Gonna have to try being other princesses!

Bangkok Trails

2009-02-22T03:26:00.000-08:00

Greeting From the Hottest Place ever!
Imagine Living in a oven 24 hours! I wonder how the thais get their patience and their cheey smiles all year round 365! Amazing !!

As usual we went out shopping all nice and DRY.. and came back sore and Sweaty. I cant really dictate what happened exactly on which days and the places i went to each day, BBT! gosh.. like that sheep boy we went back 3 bags Fuuuullll...! (or More really)

Each night we were achy and sore.. and really i should not .. I repeat!! SHOULD NOT! wear my neckermans long distance! Good old flip flops are the way to go.

Okay So in a lump.. i went to Platitum Fashion Mall, Pratunam Market Place, MBK, Big C Supermarket, Central World Plaza, Pantip Plaza, random Shops arounds the corners,Chinatown(Yaowaraj).

I did a full hall of beauty treatments ahha.. Weisze! I know where to bring us next round! After been hair dyed, eye lash permed, Mani and Pedicured, Aroma-oil full body massaged.. i feel like a whole different person! Quite a amazing feeling...

I thought i wasnt really the kinda girl who would sit on the chair patiently while my hair gets dyed in a funky colour for 2-3 hours... ahha.. but apparrently.. i thought wrong.

What helped to get the edge off was the in built thought in every girls mind-"The price to pay for beauty" is playing in my head together with the when-rushing-to-board-in-hongkong-airport-song repeatedly.

As fidgety as i am the above seemed to help. Ooh and did i mention.. they also have me in front of this computr now so i can blog and surf while waiting for the hair colour to set!

*LOL* What an adventur with mum !~

Ayat Ayat Cinta..

2009-02-17T06:48:00.000-08:00

So i have been humming and singing this song so much now that mum may think i'm not cheena enough... ANOTHER MALAY SONG! Weet~

Someone tell me what it all means? It would make more sense if i knew what i was singing.

THE YOU TUBE LINK

Rossa
Ayat-Ayat Cinta lyrics
Desir pasir di padang tandus
Segersang pemikiran hati
Terkisah ku di antara cinta yang rumit

Bila keyakinanku datang
Kasih bukan sekadar cinta
Pengorbanan cinta yang agung
Ku pertaruhkan

reff:
Maafkan bila ku tak sempurna
Cinta ini tak mungkin ku cegah
Ayat-ayat cinta bercerita
Cintaku padamu
Bila bahagia mulai menyentuh
Seakan ku bisa hidup lebih lama
Namun harus ku tinggalkan cinta
Ketika ku bersujud

Bila keyakinanku datang
Kasih bukan sekedar cinta
Pengorbanan cinta yang agung
Ku pertaruhkan

repeat reff

Ketika ku bersujud

Embracing culture

2009-02-08T07:21:00.000-08:00

Been looking at this membership for Asian Civilsation musuem and the Singapore Musuem for a while already. Maybe its time to spend some time building up abit more culture.

I cant wait till the dental course ends! Gonna go join some volunteering at the museum!

I know my friends arent the artsy type or into culture type but i love it!

So if your ever feeling generous or suddenly want to spend some $$ but dont know where to spend on.. AHem AHem...Membership would be nice.. haha

Too Hopeful ... in our once in a while friendship

2009-02-07T07:47:00.000-08:00

I thought you would understand.

So disappointed in you today, sam.

A glimpse of reality

2009-02-02T19:06:00.000-08:00

I went to visit my neighbourhood doctor to get some meds today. It was kinda early but i thought since the were 24 hours they would be open by then. Well, the clinic decided to cut operation cost i guess so their opening at 8 in the morning to 12midnight with only one doctor.

Anyways i was waiting for my turn and there was this man and woman whom i thought was a couple but turned out to be just friends. The Women was talking about how the Man could save his marriage. Interesting really. I wondered if i'd go to sam for marriage advice. Then in the late morning i received a invite from a friend i met in poly to her ROM. What luck!

Well.. what a day!

As our friends get married off one by one..

I get less and less scared of it...

Odd isnt it?

May we all work on our happily ever afters..

Growing up

2009-01-26T04:01:00.000-08:00

Now that i have embarked on a different phase in my life.

I decided that a change was only appropriate.

Congratulations my dear friends you have officially been with me long enough to be part of my positively random life!

I've got a few things i am happily looking forward to...

Braces!

CITY ALIVE! SINGAPORE’S BIGGEST STREET DANCE PARTY

Salsa with dear philip!

DSA Convocation in MAY!

Alot more saturday night at Soulful! Timber

Dinning at Sinful! Nectarie le'Dessert Patisserie